these fingers so frail paint in my mind
scars down the back of my eyes
death walks with me alone tonight
the coldness whispers it's almost near
rest for soon it will be over
years flash before my and i understand why i'm here
no one will ever know, as the pictures come clear
don't worry they tell me this feeling won't last forever
voices beating their drums in my heart
the water looks so peaceful below and the struggle lets go
climbing over the wall of life's edge
leaving behind the smiles of yesterday
the light that shined has vanished to a grayscale of night
tears once present now look into the dryness inside
silent words enter the sky screamed
from this body as a reply, and these words begin to write
dear lord, if these break the earth
and enter your courts save me tonight
time is short and the hurt of death grows with every breath
here i am at the end
this wall that blocked you out for so long opens wide
and i begin to burn from the inside
i'll never forget that night
the night Jesus Christ made the blackness white

angels mourn crying, praying for your soul
as my eyes open from their state of sleep i feel my blood
turn into a frozen river
nightmares so close death was in the air
my heart locked shut, and i gave you the key
promise never to leave
as lies hold me emptiness fills my broken heart
screaming your name hoping for a response, silence summer
drowned by winter
to look in your face and realized the time we spent the chances i
had have drifted away from my fingertips
your life, your thoughts, your dreams, your love
never tried my hardest and now i cray as the hurt enters
i love you and i still love you
even though i never showed it
a piece of me is gone forever
clutching memories held so close
repeating words of love spoken to late
my eyes look all around but all they can focus on is you
for in you i find me
days past by and thy death still lingers
this coldness will never satisfy me
i want to be surrounded by angels in a place
where the sun is so warm it burns my insides
surrounded by angels
where love takes my darkest depressions
and throws it into the deepest of sea
a place i can call home, i'm crying to you Jesus
mend me, break me, make me
you're all i've got now
my eyes look all around but all they can focus on is you
for in you i find me
farewell my friend your time has come
and never will i be able to tell you i love you again

the day i left you was the worst mistake i ever made
was ready to become something i didn't need you dragging me down
thought your love just wasn't enough
my hair combed, nice shoes tied tight
was ready to conquer life
help unwanted i can do this on my own and then i found myself wounded
tripping over myself, falling and scraping my knee
sadness fills for i know i've failed
why did i leave scared to go back
hoping you'll take me in with open arms
but also know the hurt i've caused
the breeze of angel wings
standing there a midst of lowers of every being
tears grow and orchestra begins to play
what a beautiful day, why are you alone
run child it's time for you to go home
wounded spirit face in the dirt
i cry out for you to take me in
your heart holds me close, and
i look up to face this world which so scares me
faith in you loneliness just seems to fade.
the man once inside now a child walking in your footsteps
hoping held leaves under feet from the trees of fall
listening to autumn's call
a deep breathe to continue on, fragile
depending on you Christ carry's me the rest of the walk

i see thy love in the distance
breathless gasping for air, for in thy dreams you where
awakening to the bleakness in my room
as my eyes begin to blear reality sets and starts the fear
for do dreams come true or do i die alone
waiting like the petals of a wilting flower fall off
until there is non and the once beautiful flowers dies naked
with no one to clothe it
will i hold you in the grave or will the grave hold me?
the numbing dreams never end the swallow's wings still amonsgt
the idle wind
my colored wold turns to grayscale
recollecting the memories eyes covered hazel
contradiction of thy thoughts standing calm love not lost
searching till i find my princess whose passionate eyes cut right through me
for what is life if love only exists in thy thoughts?
what is romance if it is all fiction?
nothing but a portrait left empty, a passing cloud of hurt
by to meet ym love in the flesh is to find my whole heart
your heart breaks though me your love is the key
longing for my hearts door
to what day till i see sunrays shine upon your face
i dream of you the way you look
the beating of love in your heart
your wolds are like the flowing of a spring, knowing thy love
waits for me until eternity's end
is this poetry or is this love's sickness
engulfing my every being
take the heart from you and the blood ceases from me
i see what you hear
breathe taking the closest thing to me and my savior
falling in love to a person i have never met but knowing she has salvation's
fragrance
by God's grace this love will be free and able to fly away above
the earth to a point of exhaustion
but your breath will keep me alive
words are pointless for this love is speechless
preparing fro the curtains close
laying their clutching hands so tight i can feel your heart
telling me it will be all right
ascension to heaven wehre this love can not only walk
but it runs through the endless fields of joy
where love neither ends nor begins but flows everlasting
this was thy dream this daybreak and will by thy prayer
that i will rest sleepless till the sun rises on that day
and butterflies sing with us as we write love symphony
the pages of life fill the story of our love in a time long ago
where fairy tales come true
and you and i my love will live happily everafter
i love you

it happened all so fast heavy with sleep my eyes closed
the next thing i remember was crawling out from the car and
seeing you lying there
holdin your head kissing you for the last time
the taste of blood on my lips
your clothes torn apart perfumed with gas
it seems like it was yesterday when the rain poured down
i can still hear your screams as if it was happening all over again
saturday, december 4th that night woudl become a grave
that would crush my heart
joy and laughter exchanged for grief and silence
searching for so long to fnd you and the moment
you were ripped from me
laying here on this empty shelf never to be read again
in these pages lies every memory of you
the wind blew your heart over my eyes and i slept for days
praying not to awake, but these dreams can only last so long
facing the day looking through these tears
i'll always look back and remember that night as you lay there
looking over that casket seeing your face times of past rushing
touching your cold hand wishing it woudl touch me back
you look so pretty lying thee just like the first day we met
it feels so real like olt times but it's nothing, it's nothing
i can taste the stale air on my tongue and death lights up the sky
hope finds itself it and end stopping at my thoughts
pictures of you help bring back the tears
walking in the present but living in the past
how much longer will i embrace sorrow?
from the moment you entered my life
my whole outlook on love would change
you brought out a happiness i didn't even know i had
and now you've gone leaving without a goodbye
that glass heart that rested in my chest has fallen and shattered
here on lord is the remains of a broken heart
for i have faith you can give me joy and life again
death has fallen but love covers me
heaven is now home to my angel of love