4. Touchdown Boy
There's this one guy
There's no one like him in all the world
'Cause you can always see
Those girls down on there knees
In those dark sweaty rooms
Planning out his thoughts
He's waiting for just the right
One by one as they
Walk right through the door, they
Keep on coming back I
Guess they just want more
He has fun fun fun and you
Might call him a whore, but
Just look where he's at 'cause
He is the one that scores
I saw my friend there
Out on the field today
I asked him where he's going, he said
All the way, now
One by one as they
Walk right through the door, they
Keep on coming back I
Guess they just want more
He has fun fun fun and you
Might call him a whore, but
Just look where he's at 'cause
He is the one that scores
Go!
5. Strings
I would do anything and that's
What scares me so bad
Don't want to live my life alone
Don't want to go back to what I had
Don't want to spend my life without
All those special things
Don't want to walk around being tied to
Anyone else's
Strings, strings, strings, strings
I would do anything and that's
What scares me so bad
Don't want to live my life alone
Don't want to go back to what I had
Don't want to spend my life without
All those special things
Don't want to walk around being tied to
Anyone else's
Strings, strings, strings, strings
Strings, strings, strings, strings
10. TV
When I'm at work, ya, I always rush right home for lunch
So I can check out what's up on the Brady Bunch
And when I'm walking through the front door at night
I gotta see who's winning on The Price is Right, oh
I never dreamed that I'd spend my days
Staring at some tube emitting cathode rays
I need my TV
What's happening in this world, I don't care at all
But it better not pre-empt Monday Night Football
I can't even come up with my own views
I'm taught how to think from the evening news, oh
I never dreamed that I'd spend my days
Staring at some tube emitting cathode rays
I need my TV
La la la...
11. Toast & Bananas
Do you wanna know what I think of you?
'Cause you're not the way I thought you should be
Do take back what you said
It's time to fix, it's time to fix your head
And now all alone, one's less than two
I've never been better off living lonely
To listen to what you say
I couldn't care less of what you say
What did you think of me acting this way
I guess you never really thought at all
Is that what you call your brain?
Is that why I call you hang up on me?
I wanted to know, I didn't want to lose
And now I'm a man who's just living small
Listen to what you say
I couldn't care less of what you say
To me as I walk alone I'd
Much rather be riding prone, then
To be just another one you are lame to
I wanted to know, I didn't want to lose
But now I'm a man who's just living small
Listen to what you say
I couldn't care less of what you say
To me as I tune you out of my mind
Won't bend over backwards or
Take another step ahead to
Hear from you again
Don't talk to me as I walk alone, I'd
Much rather be riding prone, than
Be just another one you are lame to
Don't talk to me as I tune you out of my mind
Won't bend over backwards or
Take another step ahead to
Hear from you again
Don't talk to me as I walk alone, I'd
Much rather be riding prone, than
To be just another one you are lame to
14. Ben Wah Balls
(No we ain't gonna take it unless it's from a doverman pincher
Ladies and gentlemen, for your listening pleasure, Blink)
Passively one day as the sun rose out of it's house
So did this little old guy as he whistled out of his mouth
And happily and gay
Well I guessed exactly that
Because he found a special girl
That put him in a special trance
He fell in love so quickly
What the hell was he to expect
That the girl under his arm wasn't the same
As any other girl
That he had thought that he once met
I guess you could only blame fate
Things started getting weird as they started to kiss
She often felt his beard and remembered how her father she missed
And then quietly one day
He sang a song from deep within his heart
Causing some ingestion
He finished with a great big fart and
She knew at that one moment
That song was something she heard before
So she asked him to do that again
Then out the door they hurried
She was gonna find out for sure
So she analyzed his rear end
She said, When I was a little girl my dad left my mom.
He used to always fart and sing this special song.
Now I wasn't quite so sure until your pants did fall.
'Cause now I know that your my dad because you use ben wah balls.
I said a wah, wah, wah-wah-wah,
Wah, wah-wah-wah, wah...
I said a wah, wah, wah-wah-wah,
Wah, wah-wah-wah, wah...
15. Depends
I don't want to urinate on myself
I don't want to urinate on anyone else
Well, I guess that really doesn't matter anymore
Because I can't control my bladder anymore
Well, I guess it all depends (undergarments)
Well, I guess it all depends (undergarments)
Step back in the light
No more soiled nights alone
But I guess I don't have a care
Because there's not a load in my underwear
I'm sick of offending everyone I meet (go, go, go, go)
I'm sick of crying myself to sleep on rubber sheets (go)
I had an accident today
I left a soil on a bus seat, I didn't know what to say
But, I guess it all depends (undergarments)
Well, I guess it all depends (undergarments)
Step back into life (go, go)
No more soiled nights alone
Well, I guess that I don't have a care
If I on't have a load in my underwear